Cranach At The Royal Academy

The Royal Academy is hosting the new Cranach Paintings Exhibition and the catalogue lists and illustrates 125 exhibits, of which most are paintings, some in matched pairs, 106 in all.Of these, 47 that were shown in Frankfurt are not included in the Academy’s version of the exhibition,and no-one seems to know why-unless they have been stolen or are missing in between exhibitions. Eleven drawings are also absent, so too the sketchbook-cum-album amicorum that gives us the only clear insight into the work and personality of young
Hans Cranach.The whole exhibition has been reduced by two-fifths, the exhibition is gravely impoverished : a number of direct comparisons that its catalogue proposes cannot be made, we are no clearer in the Cranach-not-Cranach debate at any stage of his very long activity and, since no painting is quite certainly dateable before 1502 when he was 30. Also we still have not the slightest idea of how the development of the elder Lucas began, nor what an early work might look like.

Konrad Celtis, celebrated German humanist a decade or so older than Cranach, founder of learned societies from the valley of the Rhine to Kraków, a startlingly erotic poet and a wanderer from princely courts to that of the Holy Roman Emperor, deplored what he saw as Germany’s neglect of the liberal arts and damned it for its “drunkenness, barbarism, cruelty and everything that is bestial and foolish”. These, however, are in large measure what Cranach reflects in his paintings, yet the propaganda associated with the exhibition seeks to rehabilitate him, to rescue him from his long-standing reputation as the master of a factory mass producing replicas and variants of his original ideas, and to promote him as a discreet genius capable of creating a new visual language that fused the traditions of central Europe north of the Alps with those of the Italian Renaissance, a German Zeuxis for German courts as cultivated as those of the dukes of Italy. Cranach, we are told, is to be seen, not only as the Raphael, the Parmigianino, the Correggio of the larger Germany, but as a humanist, a classicist, and a brilliant intellectual who could with ease tread the tightrope between the militant new Protestantism of Luther, his friend, and the traditional Catholicism of Cardinal Albrecht of Brandenburg, his most constant patron Cranach profited mightily from both. Every Protestant of means and influence wanted a portrait of Luther, and in his position as court painter in Wittenberg to three successive Saxon Electors, he was so ideally placed to initiate and receive hundreds of commissions that he became, de facto, the official painter of Luther as monk, in disguise as Junker Jörg, as Doctor of Theology, and as plain Luther, husband of an erstwhile nun. For the Cardinal he painted altarpieces and pictures that flattered him as St Jerome. And for the court he turned to erotica.

If Cranach is known at all to a wider English public than those few of us who enjoy prowling round provincial German art galleries, it is as a painter of scrawny female nudes, occasionally wisped about in veils, occasionally wearing My Fair Lady hats, pretending to be Venus, Diana, Lucretia and other mythological figures with an excuse for nakedness. As with all pornography, they conform to an artificial ideal of beauty or what is sexually attractive. I doubt if Cranach ever drew a nude woman, but he seems to have known just enough of anatomy to create a creature of erogenous zones, of nipples, breasts, wasp-waists and buttocks topped by the fashionable face and knowing look with which to trigger excitement in the cod-pieces of the barbarous German aristocracy, but though some are exquisitely painted, they are cold little fish with nothing of the warm sensuality of Titian or Correggio. This chill erotic quality spills over into less secular subjects, into the Eves of Eden and even into such figures fully-clothed as Salome with the Baptist’s Head, Lot’s daughters readying him for incest, the virtuous Bathsheba and Judith and, most suspect of all, his St Helena, a harlot with her arm about the cross. As for Cranach’s personification of Charity, the greatest of the Theological Virtues — far from giving the image “a new spiritual meaning” (as the catalogue has it), he has converted this ecclesiastical icon into a provocatively sensual image of fecundity and yet another naked woman with knowing look. Painted in 1534, it anticipates the disturbing qualities ofthe kiss in Bronzino’s Allegory of Venus and Cupid (in the National Gallery), painted a decade or so later. That picture, no matter how unpleasant we may find it, is a masterpiece; Cranach’s is inept provincial smut. Inept is the word too for Cranach’s Golden Age. Given c1530 as its date, Cranach at 60 or so hardly offers us “a prime example of the inventive spirit” claimed by the writer of the catalogue entry. Woven into a steeply rising tapestry of flowers, shrubs and trees are a dozen naked figures, dancing, reclining, whispering sweet nothings over grapes that are the attribute of Bacchus, and splashing each other in a stream: a Golden Age of idleness set safely in a walled garden in which the lion lies with, if not the calf of Isaiah’s prophecy, a pair of fawns. It should be idyllic, but the critical eye sees only a creaking composition of stiff and stilted poses, awkwardly and unconvincingly strung across the foreground plane, a climbing perspective so steep that, instead of a continuous landscape reaching far into the distance, we have a tilted stage and a backdrop of mountains peeping over the clumsy garden wall with which Cranach conceals his inability to construct and control a logical pictorial space when he cannot enlist the help of linear perspective. The fawns and the parent deer are beautiful and obviously based on studies from the life; the landscape elements too suggest immediate observation (and pictorial adjustment), but the figures are a laboured compilation of inflexible workshop templates.

Could Cranach have studied the naked male? Could? Yes, easily in the all male context of the painter’s workshop. But did he? A tiny panel of Hercules lifting Antaeus, of the same period, suggests not, so absurd is the anatomy, but the catalogue entry, without further comment on the matter, instructs us not to ignore “the sexual connotation of this highly intimate embrace (penis to penis) between two completely naked men”. Does the writer know something of workshop behaviour or courtly Saxon patronage that justifies this exhortation? All in all this is an unsatisfactory exhibition: perhaps it worked better in Frankfurt, but at the Academy, savagely cut back, it is hung in such a way that those who know nothing of Cranach’s stylistic development will continue to know nothing. I found myself constantly questioning the estimated dates and the implied authenticity — implied very simply by not raising the matter in extended catalogue entries more concerned with explaining imagery than the ’tis, ’tisn’t question of who painted a particular picture; their opinions on all other matters of Cranach connoisseurship are, perhaps, as worthless. Among the early paintings The Schotten Crucifixion is in very damaged state and extensively repaired, but where it more or less survives it seems technically alien to other paintings of the same supposed period, and in mood, almost a caricature of a Cranach; is it not a feeble copy by a weak hand rather than the earliest surviving authentic work at the age of 30? How could he, in only two years, reach from the cramped simplicities of this composition to the crowded but clear complexities of the two woodcut Crucifixions of 1502 (one not exhibited) and then, within three years or so, produce a painting as large, complex, densely crowded and spectacular as The Martyrdom of St Catherine from Budapest? This undoubted masterpiece is one of the few paintings in the exhibition that we can safely use as a benchmark of Cranach’s quality as draughtsman, painter, inventor of grotesque and violent motifs and characteristic physical types. With an estimated quarter century between them, the fallen soldier on the right is a spectacular precursor of the lifted Antaeus. Another indisputable benchmark is the triptych of The Holy Kinship, signed and dated 1509, a remarkable exercise in linear perspective and didactic purpose, promoting as scripture the legend that St Anne married three times, bearing to each husband a daughter named Mary, the eldest the mother of Christ, the others of, between them, six disciples. The Kinship has little to support it in the New Testament, but, though apocryphal, it had much support in northern Europe; here it is a roman à clef, of Saxon court portraiture and loyalties and one must ask who could have been responsible for so political an underlying programme — a courtly priest or humanist perhaps, but surely not Cranach himself ? And over which altar, and where, might this almost secular triptych have been placed?

This lazy exhibition asks and answers too few questions about a prolific painter whose signatures often signify nothing. Do the very slight Italian influences in the early work suggest an unreceptive response to an Italian Wanderjahr? In the autumn of 1508 Cranach was briefly in the Netherlands on a diplomatic errand, and the influence of Quentin Matsys is evident in The Holy Kinship and some slight softening of outlines and contours in some smaller pictures. Otherwise he remained resolutely within the German tradition, affected only by Dürer from his own generation. To measure the man we must remove him from the German context and compare him with such other contemporaries as Titian, Raphael, Correggio and Parmigianino, in a land where a real Renaissance was taking place — then we see how small he was, how parochial and primitive.

Cranach is at the Royal Academy ( 020 7300 8000 ) until 8 June. Daily 10am-6pm (Friday until 10pm).
Admission £8, concs available. www.royalacademy.org.uk

Writing Reviews-What Best To Include

When I write reviews for anything I do have a few general rules. I try to write as objectively as much as possible and perhaps depending on the publication make comments relative to personal preferences in moderation endeavouring to be exact and as fair as possible. I always try look for something positive or good as unless everything is so bad will I be severe and criticise.
I think the following are things that needed to be taken into account when writing a good review.When writing reviews of eating places these are few of the rules that I follow in a required flexible manner:
1. Comment on the appearance and cleanliness of the exterior and interior of the restaurant. (Though avoid making negative comments for things that are beyond their control like broken pavements and parking spaces). Make note of the posters being displayed and the messages conveyed by them. Comments whether they are eye-catching and blend in with the theme of the restaurant or are conceptually conveying the message.
2. Make note of queuing time and the manner by which you were greeted by the member of staff serving you. Try to remember the exact greetings said. Make note also whether the member of staff asked for apology in case there was delay in serving you.
3. Comment on the presentability of the members of staff e.g. were they neat and dressed properly, were they wearing name badges? Observed whether their manner of greetings was perfunctorily or genuinely delivered. Were they smiling?
4. Take note of the length of time taken when serving your order. Good customer service should also include satisfaction check back. This should be included in a review.
5. Most importantly, comment on the quality of the food. Were they served in an appropriate temperature, did they taste good? Were they as described in the menu?
6. The cleanliness of cutlery and utensils must also be observed. Were they clean and presentable?
7. Visit the rest room. Observed the smell and its cleanliness. Appliances should be in good working condition, supply of soap and tissues should be adequatebecause I think you will if the restrooms are in good condition the cooking will be well kept.
8. Observed whether music was being played and whether it was appropriate relative to the time of day. Make note also of the general temperature inside the restaurant-very important for serving wine.
9. In paying for your order, note the friendliness of cashier, i.e. did he thanked you for your payment, did he confirmed the exact amount (if paying cash), was his greetings genuine.
10. If you are commissioned to do the review by a mystery shopping company, make it sure to keep the receipt and note the shops adjacent to the restaurant as proof that you visited it plus the level of trade during your visit, give an approximate number of customers present.

Tipping In RestaurantsAnd Other Places

Whenever I eat especially on a special occasion or go somewhere expensive I am always confronted by two thoughts the restaurant table is "What should I eat?," and "What should I tip?" Our perception of service each time we dine out as it not only affects our experience; it also affects the experience of our waiting staff both for that day, and for the days to come. The subject of tipping is still as hot as a sizzling kebab platter, but it can still be boiled down to a few basic questions and answers.

Why should I tip?

With a few exceptions, the staff that serve you at a restaurant not only need, but deserve, the tip if you think they have done a good job. and looked after you well.Some people will argue that the term for tipping is "gratuity," implying that the tip is optional- well again depends on what type of wages they may be on and how big your party is and whether they are boisterous or rowdy-because that can create more work for the waiting staff and obviously what type of establishment it is.If it is a cheap one then the diner may not consider tipping to be that important.


Ethics aside, consider that the staff at the restaurant not only cooks and serves your food, but processes your bill, cleans everything from the tables to the bathroom, maintains health standards, and provides "on call" customer service to unpredictable patrons and you can probably agree that the wait staff deserves a little extra for the time and effort they put in to providing your dining experience because unlike office based customer service staff you have direct contact with your waiter or waitress-and its all about personal service and attention tempered by objectivity.

Who am I tipping?

Who your tip actually goes to depends on the restaurant. While it's true that in some restaurants, the tip goes entirely to the waiter, it is more often the case that the tip is pooled with the rest of the tips for the day, and split among the wait staff, hosts, and even chefs. This means that while you may want to reward a particular excellent waiter, they may not see as much of that tip as you'd hope; it also means that a low tip may be punishing the entire wait staff for one person's poor service. In addition, some restaurants deduct operational costs for credit card processing charges from tips. In short: you are more likely tipping the staff of the restaurant, not just your particular waiter or waitress.

What should I tip?

For some, tipping is automatic; others use a tipping calculator. There are, of course, other special exceptions that require consideration as well. The basic rule of thumb is to tip 15 to 20% of your bill to your wait staff. But wait - is that pre-vat or the full bill?

The argument to tip based on the sub-total is that the taxes don't go to the restaurant or wait staff; they go to the government. Why pay the waiter on what the government charges? Logically, this makes sense. Consider, however, that most waiters expect a tip based on the full bill, and the difference between pre-vat and post-vat is only a matter 17.5%. Also consider that waiters have to pay taxes on their tips, however meager they may be. Why short a few extra pence in the wallet to someone who worked hard to provide you a good meal?

When should I not tip?

There are always going to be a few exceptions to the average meal in the restaurant, when tips come into question. Keeping in mind the above facts, consider why a tip may not be appropriate in these circumstances. Was the food cooked poorly? In this case, a complaint to the manager may be more efficient to punish the offender, if the remainder of your restaurant experience was at least average. Was the waiter unavailable? Consider any circumstances, such as a busy night or under-staffing, before passing that judgment off on the tip. But if multiple things were wrong with your dining experience - or the wait staff was plain unavailable, rude, or worse, unhelpful - then consider leaving a minimal tip of about 10%. You should only withhold the tip if the dining experience was truly unacceptable.

So the next time you leave a restaurant table, think twice about that important tip question also remember, the best way to thank anyone - outside of a tip - is a heartfelt thank you spoken directly to your wait staff.

How To Wine And Dine With Your Boss

Dining with your boss or work colleagues can be an absolute nightmare if you don't know how you will present yourself. On such an important matter at times it is best to feel comfortable with some social etiquette .
Whether this is the awful Christmas party or a celebratory meal for an excellent performance, pausing to think about the evening and considering these few hints will give you the confidence to perform well.
1. It will always be work
Just because you are out of office hours, don't get lulled into a false sense of security you are technically at work. Think of the problems the social networking pages are presenting for employees who have happily confessed to all sorts of misdemeanours, only to find a letter terminating their employment. This is because most contracts of employment still have the clause about bringing the company into disrepute. Therefore, getting completely hammered and throwing up on your boss's shoes is probably not the best way forward to enhance your career prospects it could jeopordise any future promotional prospects in the company. Don't forget, moderation in drink and behaviour will see you through in the long run.
2. Remember not to try and outsmart the boss
It is always great to be the centre of attention and being able to make people laugh is a real asset. Of course there are some people you just don't want to outshine. If the boss asks you a question answer in a thoughtful fashion,depending on what the question may be.
I was once at an evening social event, and we were all getting on so well with one another, until one employee just could not resist in trying to outdoing the boss in funny stories. Without realising, they soon developed a competition as to who had done the most outrageous things . Everyone else fell silent as this verbal jousting continued as it became quite uncomfortable to watch. There was a definite impact at work as the boss was clearly put out by this and this affected his relationship with the individual.
Be funny and witty but don't try to steal the whole show give the boss a chance to show off after all it is his company.
3. Bringing your spouse/partner
You will have gone home at least some evenings and moaned and complained to your beloved about your boss or your colleagues, and you may have possibly have exaggerated slightly! You just switch off as you have to work with these people but you partner will be feeling quite cross on your behalf that someone has treated you badly.
Unless you give him clear instructions as to who is who, and what he can properly know about company secrets and, more specifically he can't (evidence that you can't keep company secrets is never helpful) he will be a ticking time bomb waiting to explode your career prospects all around like party poppers.
4. What to wear and what not to wear
This is quite possibly a issue for females only, but usually at work you tend to dress in a professional way no low cut tops and not much leg on show.
The problem with business dining is that you feel this is an opportunity to unleash the real you and that may be very tempting- big hair, big eyes, low cut dresses and legs that go on and on and on. Great. Yes, most definitely everyone will be talking about you the next day and your clients and your boss will see you in a different light, but all your credibility will be sliding down the drain, along with your career.
This doesn't mean you cannot dress sexily but in moderation , less is more. If you have your legs on show, keep your bosoms under control and vice versa.
5. What to eat
You may love spaghetti bolognaise but sucking the long strands of pasta through your teeth, while splattering your neighbours with drops of a detergent resistant tomato sauce, will not be the impression you are seeking to create. Remember at very formal functions use the cutlery from outwards gravitating inwards-I learnt that little trick at university and it has never failed me.
Think of the dining scene involving snails in Pretty Woman just order food that is easy to eat. If there is set menu then you can relax because you will not have worry about choice.Most company functions these days either go for buffets or a set menu.
6. Pay your way
This can always be tricky don't assume that the company credit card is picking up the entire.If drinking alcohol then be sure to ask who is paying so there is no misunderstanding.
Also, if you just assume the company is paying, and leave before the end of the night, your work colleagues will end up picking up your share.
Likewise, when you are settling tabs, please don't quibble about the last 27pence, or say loudly, "but I only had a small coke to drink", when in fact you have a good share of several bottles of wine.
Hopefully, your business dining will now run at least a little smoother than before and you will gain a reputation as being good company and an asset to firm for which you work.

How To Order Wine In A Restaurant

Selecting wine to go with your meal in a restaurant need not be a daunting experience. In fact, servers in elegant restaurants are often very knowledgeable when it comes to wine and can make some good recommendations. Even so, it's a good idea to learn which wines go well with particular foods to enjoy the dining experience more fully.
A few general rules, and they are general because they have exceptions, are that red wines are good with vegetables and red meats and white wines are good with fish, poultry and salads. So red goes with red things and white goes with white things-easy to remember. These are general rules because for example the French vegetable dish ratatouille is made with white wine and a prosciutto salad is ideal with a red wine.
When eating foods that have mild flavours such as baked trout, quiche and risotto, delicate wines are the best choice. My list of favourite light wines includes Sauvignon Blanc, Pinot Noir, Riesling and Champagne. People's preferences often differ here. For example, I prefer dry wines with main dishes but some people prefer semi-sweet to sweet wines. It's simply a matter of taste.
When eating spicy and strong-flavoured dishes, it's important to choose a full-flavoured wine which will not be dominated by the dish. For dishes such as curry chicken, pepper steak and red hot chicken wings, delicate wines are out. Instead, choose wines that can compliment such dishes. Examples include Chablis, Merlot, Shiraz and Cabernet Sauvignon.
With salads, I recommend Sauvignon Blanc, especially if the salad has a light dressing. For pasta and pizza, I prefer Chianti, an excellent Italian wine, but many other wines such as Cabernet Sauvignon and Shiraz are also popular. For fish and chicken, Sauvignonlanc is an excellent choice, but if the fish and chicken are in a spicy sauce, smoked, barbecued and strong-flavoured, I prefer a full-flavoured wine such as Chablis. With strong-flavoured cheeses such as stilton or Danish blue, port is a great wine. Amazingly, the sweetness of the port and the strong aroma and flavour of a stilton and Danish blue complement each other extremely well. With foie gras, I recommend Champagne but many people prefer red wines such as Shiraz and Merlot. With desserts, I quite like the Hungarian Tokaj wine which King Louis XIV reputedly called "le roi des vins" and "le vin des rois" which means the king of wines and the wine of kings. Other excellent choices, though, include port and ice wine. Cabernet sauvignon is a popular choice for dark chocolate.
Many rules can be given for selecting which wines to match with particular dishes in a restaurant. The truth, though, is that people's tastes differ. Fortunately, it isn't necessary to be familiar with a vast number of wines to select an appropriate wine for a dish. The reason is that many wines are good with a great number of dishes and if you have a favourite wine, you may choose to order it with most dishes. The only way to truly learn which wines you prefer with particular dishes is to experiment and discover for yourself.

How to order sushi like an expert

When sushi first started to catch on in the UK as something regular on our restaurant menus I was basically very reluctant to try it out.For a long while I carefully avoided it being put off by the raw fish and the thought of eating all that rice. But I am glad to say I have tried it since and after a few attempts my opinion has greatly changed,especially the misunderstanding sushi as consists only of raw fish. But I suppose that is the reason many people won't even try it. If you haven't sampled it then I think you should take the plunge and go for it because it is a delicious and reasonably healthy meal as well being a really sociable and relaxed way of eating with friends or even alone if you eat in a traditional sushi bar where you are served at the counter or pick from a conveyor belt it's less obvious that you are alone and this is a factor that appeals to many people.

If you are eating out there are two styles of sushi restaurant there are the ones where you sit at a table or counter and order your food from the menu, or the more modern style where diners are seated around a conveyor belt and pick from the dishes that pass by. In the traditional order at table restaurant you may be provided with a menu that is illustrated and this will help you learn the names of the various kinds of sushi and you will see what you are ordering. Of course, when seated at the conveyor belt of sushi train you get to see exactly what there is so its much easier, although at first you may not recognize some of the more unusual types of fish and seafood that are used to make it.


Sushi is a combination of dressed rice that is either formed into rolls, or small clumps with different fillings or toppings. Raw fish can be used but cooked fish and vegetables are also used. When a piece of sushi comprises only of a piece of raw fish or seafood with no rice, this is known as "sashimi".

Diners dip the pieces of sushi into soy sauce to enrich the flavour and it is a must if you are going to appreciate the real taste- trust me it does make a difference to the taste.Sometimes the chef may add wasabi to the sushi; it's a very piquant green paste made from a root like horseradish and it takes a little getting used to as too much can blow the top of your head off! If you find it too hot or you are a novice, check whether any wasabi has been used by the chef before adding your own. Wasabi is reputed to have anti-microbial properties that may vastly reduce the risk of food poisoning so if you can build up a tolerance to the immense kick from the wasabi, so much the better. I like to add a little to my dish of soy sauce but purists say that this spoils the sauce. After each piece, or couple of pieces, eat a sliver of sweet, pickled ginger; not only does this refresh the palate but ginger is said to have properties that aid digestion.

To me, seeing the pieces of brightly coloured sushi set out reminds me of candies in a store window. Sushi-making is a serious art and sushi chefs train for years to master the techniques. There's a whole language involved in sushi-making but a few terms will be beneficial to the sushi novice.

"Nori" this is the name given to the flat sheets are seaweed that are used to make the shell for sushi rolls and the wrapping for cones of rice.

"Makisushi" these are rolls of sushi; rice is laid onto the sheet of nori with a filling, then rolled into a tube before being cut into bite sized pieces.

"Nigirisushi" these are the little mounds of compressed rice that are topped with a sliver of fish or seafood. Unlike other kinds of sushi, these are usually eaten with the fingers because they have a tendency to break up when you use chopsticks to pick them up.

"Inarisuhi" these are little cones of nori that are filled with tofu or sometimes rice.

"Chirashi sushi" this is when you get a basket or dish that has a base of rice and then various pieces of raw fish, seafood and vegetables scattered over it.

Salmon (in Japanese "sake"), shrimps (ebi) and tuna (toro, akimi) are probably the most recognizable of the fish toppings used in sushi but other commonly used ones are mackerel (saba), eel (unagi) and snapper (kurodai). Commonly used vegetables are daikon ( a peppery white radish-like root vegetable), avocado used in the very pretty California rolls), cucumber and sweet (bell) peppers. Often you will see pieces of sushi topped off with a little cluster of roe (ikura); these taste delicious but also add a new and unusual texture to the sushi.

Although many Japanese restaurants offer sake (an alcoholic drink distilled from fermented rice) its not a great drink to accompany sushi because a similar flavoring is used to dress the rice. Therefore my advice would be to stick to drinking water with your food then have a mug of green tea afterwards to aid digestion.

Many supermarkets now sell takeaway sushi packs which are a great introduction for sushi virgins, especially for people nervous about eating raw fish because they tend not to contain any uncooked fish at all. Instead the toppings will be vegetables or cooked fish such as tuna, smoked salmon or prawns; this is essential for supermarket bought sushi because only the very freshest fish can be used if being served raw. Supermarket sushi rarely has wasabi already added but comes with separate packets of soy sauce, pickled ginger and wasabi so you can experiment and see what you do and don't like.

Once you are familiar with the basic kinds of sushi and the ingredients used, you may wish to make your own sushi; it's a delicious and versatile food that is limited only by your imagination!

What To Complain About In a Restaurant

I think that being a waitress or waiter is a very thankless job and many people tend to treat them as servants rather than a person doing their job.I think that most customer service related jobs always demand patience and understanding and I am always careful not to be to hasty to get angry with staff that wait on me in a restaurant or cafe.There are many things that diners can get angry about and I think if there is a genuine complaint it should be made straight away to the serving staff so they can remedy any misunderstandings as soon as possible..In my opinion there are certain types of things that the waiting staff can control like:

1)If the table staff are rude, the customer has every right to be annoyed and ask for the manager. Someone who does not like dealing with people should avoid job in customer service in every way. The person who is waiting tables is the first person that a diner come into contact with and can have a drastic impact on their dining experience.First impressions do count and they do last for the whole of the meal and possibly longer especially if they decide to write a review.
2)Dirty tables and are also another thing that annoy customers and is definitely justified. Although it is the bus boy's duty to clean the tables and make sure that all the crumbs are swept out of the dining tables it is the server's job to ensure that the table they seat their customers are clean.
3)Service is a really big issue if its not included in the cover charge and nothing can be more irritating to the diner when he or she is being ignored or neglected. It is definitely alright to blame the waitress/waiter when glasses aren't refilled, plates aren't removed, and they don't ask, "Is there anything else."
Now to the real topic of conversation,when its not alright to blame your waitress/waiter and should not determine the tip you will leave behind.
1)When your food isn't cooked the way you wanted it how can you possibly blame your waitress/waiter? Its the cooks fault not the servers and it is very unfair to blame him or her for this problem but it should not stop you from complaining and finding out what the chef is upto. It is the same with drinks that may have been ordered from the bar. Is the server suppose to taste it before she serves it? Blame the bartender and ask for it to be sent back.
2)Don't blame the waitress/waiter when your food isn't served as promptly as you think it should be. If the restaurant is busy they have other tables to wait on and if the cook is not doing their job the server can't get the meal out any faster.
3)And now for the last thing, be realistic. The waitress/waiter can not be blamed for items the restaurant doesn't serve such as salad dressings or vegetables. They should not be blamed for the prices or the portions.
When dining in a restaurant always remember that the waitress/waiter's job is to take your order, serve you your meal, and ensure you have what you need. Don't be rude because they don't have control over every aspect of the restaurant.

How To Cook Steak Like A Pro

Want to cook steak like a professional? Here are a few tips on how anyone can cook steak 'CHEF STYLE.'
First of all, let me tell you that you don't need a choice cut of steak to have the most tender steak ever made. Now, I'm not saying that I don't like, or absolutely LOVE a tender fillet, because I do. However, if you are feeding more than 5 people and you are on a budget - so what can you do-how do you select the steak?
Chuck Steak, Sirloin Steak, or even the sandwich cut steak are all excellent choices and worth experimenting with-I enjoy using chuck steak because it seems to be the most inexpensive and people are just blown away when they realize how tender even a "lesser" cut of meat can be. So much so, that there have been chuck steaks that have won national contests - it's all in the way that you prepare them prior to cooking them.


The night before you plan to grill, you must marinate your steaks - This is the honest to goodness key to a perfect steak. I have read about using rubs, and not spicing the meat until right before grilling,no in my opinion flavour rules the steak world.
There are different kinds of marinades to use, and you will have to try some to see what is your favourite is, but here are some keys and some recipes to get you on your way.
Key: Use CITRUS. This helps to tenderize the steak and brighten the flavors.
Marinade Recipe: Lemon Worcestershire
1 tsp lemon peel, fresh and grated
1/4 cup fresh lemon juice
1/4 cup fresh parsley sprigs
2 tbsp Worcestershire sauce
1/2 tbsp minced garlic
1/4 tsp ground red pepper
Kosher Salt and Fresh Ground Black Pepper to Your Taste.
Key: Garlic is a Chef's Best Friend!
Marinade Recipe: Lemon Garlic
4 clove garlic, sliced thin
1 small onion, chopped
1 small bottle YOUR FAVOURITE steak sauce
1/2 cup FRESH lemon juice
Kosher Salt and Fresh Ground Black Pepper to Your Taste.
Key: You can never go wrong marinating dark and red meats in red wine.
Marinade Recipe: Red Wine and Teriyaki
2 cups dry red wine
1 clove garlic, minced
1/4 cup teriyaki sauce
3 tbsp Honey
Kosher Salt and Fresh Ground Black Pepper to Your Taste.
Key: Balance your flavors by keeping them in one style.
Marinade Recipe: Mexi-Lime
1/2 cup lime juice
5 medium garlic cloves, sliced thin
1/2 small shallot, finely chopped
1/4 cup cilantro, chopped
3 tbsp honey
1/4 tsp ground red pepper
Kosher Salt and Fresh Ground Black Pepper to Your Taste
Marinade Recipe: Sizzlin' Blue Cheese
1 Bottle Blue Cheese Dressing
1/4 cup Hot Sauce

1/4 cup of olive oil
Kosher Salt and Fresh Ground Black Pepper to Your Taste.
Pick one or try your own, but marinate your steaks over night in the fridge. That's the key!
The Next day:
Start your barbeque . I believe that the only perfect grill out there is a charcoal grill with some smokey woodchips added to the mix. In order to cook your steak perfectly there is a trick in how you start your grill. To get even cooking and perfect grill marks, make sure that the coals are ashen so they retain the right medium of heat. After the charcoal is RED HOT within the barbeque spread it's contents into the grill bed evenly and after a few minute, your ready to grill.
Remove your steak from the marinade no sooner than transporting it to the grill. Once on the grill, leave the steak in place for about 8 minutes and then flip. Check your Steak for desired done-ness after another 2 to 4 minutes, and voila. You are ready to serve.
One other consideration if you really want to wow a crowd, make a second marinade at the same time that you make your steak marinade but add some butter and keep set aside in your refrigerator. After starting your grill, take your second "Specialized" marinade and put it in a grill-safe sauce pan. Let this heat to a boil on the grill while your steaks are being grilled and then, when plating the steak, cover it one final time in hot bubbling marinade. FABULOUS!
When it comes to grilling a perfect steak, there are many schools of thought. This years hottest trend is all about the marinade. I have been experimenting using marinades for meat religiously for a long time and I tell you, it beats having to spend more money on finer cuts and hands down delivers the most awesome palate pleasing flavours around. If you want that perfect steak, turn your attention here.

The difference between good and bad restaurants

Restaurants serve many purposes for the diner. A social setting away from home, the luxury of refined service, saving time by not having to cook or clean, and possibly enjoying food and drink which the diners would not eat on a regular basis at home.. As someone who eats out on a regular because of the nature of my job I can certainly point out the difference between a good restaurant and a bad one.
The first and most important item I look for is the menu selection. I look for quality, originality and the freshness of the ingredients. If a restaurant has only a small range of salads with the some basic uninteresting greens and only the dressing and a few unimaginitive vegetables to distinguish them from one another, I tend to look elsewhere- after all its my stomach I have to think of. It is always worthwhile to study the restaurant menu on the outside wall so you know what to expect.


I have a great prediliction for fresh seafood, so finding items like sea bass and ahi tuna would be a big temptation and have a would probably lure me in. Selections such as fried shrimp tend to mean that the fish is frozen prior to cooking, and be sure to steer clear of imitation anything.I am all for healthy eating and like to be careful as to what goes into my body so I like to show my palette some respect and make sure the crab has a shell. I tend to choose everything I eat with a lot of care.
When looking for a good steak I always check for prime meat. I don't want to pay £30.00 for a fillet and have to spend the evening chewing it instead of talking to my company. The meat grades are as follows: select (chewy and fit for only long, slow cooked dishes), choice (acceptable in some forms, such as a ribeye due to its fat content), and prime (the only option when ordering filet mignon, strip steak, etc.) As a rule, the better grade the meat is, the more fat it has. I'm not referring to the edge of the meat, but rather the "marbleized" quality it attains from good breeding. The white specks in an uncooked piece of meat are fat cells that melt into the meat when cooked, adding flavor. The more fat, the more flavour and eating it once in a while if good-I always like to exercise moderation.
When analyzing the menu, the last thing I look for is accompaniments, including side dishes, appetizers, sauces and dressings. I certainly enjoy creative side dishes, but some restaurants can overcharge for them, so be careful you don't end up ordering a ten pound baked potato, unless that's what you're into. Instead, look for entrees that come with an enticing side dish, like a fillet with roasted red pepper mashed potatoes, or pan seared sea bass with a potato pancake and tarragon beurre blanc-go for something more innovative and creative.
The second most important quality of a restaurant is cleanliness. Not first, mind you, because you'll probably never see the kitchen and the health inspector should have that angle covered, anyway. However, you do want to make sure the bathrooms are clean. If the bathrooms are presentable, chances are the kitchen is too. Be mindful of the floors as well, you don't want to step in a pile of french fries left by the 3 year old who sat at the table before you.
Finally, evaluate the service staff. Was the host/hostess courteous? Were you seated in a prompt fashion? If you had to wait to be seated, was the estimated time accurate? Was there a comfortable place for you to wait for your table? Did the server tell you the specials? Was he/she informed about the menu or wine list? Was he/she attentive? Did he/she replace your silverware between courses, keep your wine glass/water glass/coffee cup at least half full? Was your next course delivered only after the previous was cleared from your table? Were you offered desert or rushed out to make room?
Obviously, your personal expectations may be far different than mine, but regardless of your service standards, make sure the staff lives up to them. Remember that you are paying for the meal, and the customer IS always right!
I hope I have been of assistance in helping you to be able to distinguish a quality restaurant from a mediocre one. There is, however, only so much you can tell from peeking in a window and reading a menu taped to a door. Ultimately, you must take the risk and dine, then it's up to you. The best restaurants are the ones that you like and enjoy the most.

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My Memories-A Poem

My memories

How long has it been, that after all this time
I have not been able to forget you
for your memories are still very alive

I have wasted so much time thinking of you
even though you are not worth it.
Somehow how have managed
to stick with me, living in my mind around my mind
S many feelings between us have changed so much so many times
since you became the aim of all my anger
the justification of all my issues
but deep down I still have a wonderful love
a love that has been so good to me
other than allowing me to feel
something other than
a pain that penetrated till the end of my very being
this is all that I have got from you

and I don't see you anymore
only maybe when I think about the past

back in those days, when we had so many glorious moments
so many difficult feelings and unsaid words and then

you just disappearred?
I would love it if you took these words with you
since I know that is what you want deep inside

I wish you the best
I really do

What To Eat?

Serves:
4-6

Preparation Time:
20 minutes plus time to marinade.

Cooking Time:
30 minutes on low heat

Ingredients:
2 tbsp-olive oil
1kg large prawns or 500g shelled shrimps
1 tablespoon vinegar
1 teaspoon garlic paste
1 tablespoon tomato paste
Pinch of ajinomoto / msg (can be omitted)
2 teaspoons Hot Curry Paste
¾ cup gram flour
¼ cup refined flour
2 eggs
6 cloves garlic
1 whole bunch spring onions finely chopped

Instructions:
1. Shell and de-vein prawns. Wash and marinate with salt, vinegar and garlic paste.

2. Heat oil. Add finely chopped garlic and tomato paste. Add ½ cup water, salt, Ferns' Hot Curry Paste and ajinomoto. Simmer for 10 minutes.

3. Make a paste with 2 tablespoons corn flour and a little water and stir into the sauce to thicken. Make a batter with corn flour, refined flour and 2 eggs and salt to taste.

4. Dip the prawns in batter and deep fry in hot oil. Add the prawns to the hot garlic sauce.

Garnish with finely chopped spring onion greens and decorate with spring onion flowers.


Serving ideas: Serve with Fresh Naan bread or Rice and a nicely cut cucumber salad





Whenever I want to eat something I always find it difficult to decide as to what to eat.I am not a great believer in best cuisines and fail to see how you can pick just one cuisine and call it the best. To me its a question of taste and if it looks and tastes good I am all for it because everybody's tastes are different.

I am really lucky that I come from a diplomatic background and have travelled the world extensively and eaten foods from 20 countries and most of whatI've eated has always been delicious. Indian cuisine always comes out at the top of my favourites. The curried meats, especially lamb and chicken are always exquisitely spiced with whole spices and always so tender.I do have one simple if I am going to try out a new cuisines I will always ask a friend for a recommendation and follow that through. When comes down to vegetarian dishes I usually go for spinach and cauliflower and potato combination, which is also excellent for accompanying the ever so elegant Raan of Lamb which if prepared properly in a yoghurt marinade is usually succulent and crumbles in the mouth.I have actually been intrepid enough to make it at home and its been worth the effort. I have also given you one of my most tasty and moist curries that can be thrown together without effort.So if are reading then the this is thr recipe to make.

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Free Museums/Theatres

All of London's main museums and galleries are free to visit, apart from the occasional temporary exhibition. There are too many to list but it is enough to say you can visit all of the best known without charge - The National Gallery, the Tate, the National Portrait Gallery, the Natural History Museum, the Museum of London and the Victoria and Albert Museum. If your tastes are a bit less mainstream you should be able to find something to suit you and still not pay: the Kew Bridge Steam Museum, the Ragged School Museum, the Clowns Museum and the Dental History Museum are all free too. You could visit one free museum in London every day for weeks.
If you are interested in music you could consider one of the free organ music recitals held at lunchtimes in many of London's churches - Westminster Abbey, St. Giles-in-the-Fields and the church of St. James in Piccadilly are all good places to try and are easy to reach. For more diversity there are lunchtime concerts of all kinds of music at the Guildhall School of Music and Drama at the Barbican.
Lots of pubs have live rock, folk and country bands playing and often don't charge for entry; if you were going to the pub anyway, doesn't this count as free? Some of the London parks stage free music events during the summer and there are longer free festivals too.
Another expensive London pastime is theatre-going and, admittedly, it is more difficult to do this on a budget; however, students may be able to get free entry to drama school productions, or may even be lucky enough to bag one of the limited number of freebies for previews that are put aside for drama students.
If you are prepared to get your hand in your pocket and shell out a whole Ten Pence you may be able to get tickets for performances at the Royal Court Theatre but it will be a standing place with restricted viewing. Other fringe theatres have "Pay what you can nights" so, again, not free but close.

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London's Night Life

London is full of variety when it comes to nightlife, most clubs are open till three in the morning. For those of us who enjoy long hardcore sessions of dance and fun, they could be open for even longer but that is not always the case.
Just walk into Leicester Square and you will be overcome by the variety of clubs available, catering for every taste in music, and you will not be disappointed either. These are not just your average clubs either, the door men are all smartly dressed, polite and there has obviously been a lot of money has been invested into the club. Appearance is important-dressing smart or posh will get you noticed very quickly. All have the latest music systems and lighting effects to make it worth your while to spend a lot of money on drinks and dancing. I know because I have checked out all of them.
A good tip is to walk around a bit, just have a look at what clubs around and it is more then likely you will be approached by a club representative, they will try to persuade you to come to their club (as they are on commission they usually try and butter you up with compliments and the likes) but the useful thing about these 'reps' is that they can more often then not get you a discount on entrance, the most annoying thing about London clubs is that they can demand an entrance fee which can sometimes go up to fifteen pounds, like I said before these are no ordinary clubs.
Clubs are not unique to Leicester Square, the London nightlife spreads throughout the city in every direction, Leicester Square has the most commercial music, leave this area and you find clubs that are more specific to certain tastes. Farringdon has many clubs that are unbeatable when it comes to the latest House and Garage music. Vauxhall is famous for its growing gay scene, whereas, Soho has always had a strong concentration of clubs ranging from the gay scene to the latest hip-hop and R&B music.
London is truly a hotspot for the most innovative DJs and Music, there are many places in the world that can boast a great night out, but London offers so much more- it offers some of the best nights out you will ever find. You can actually feel the buzz and excitement of this growing area of social activity in London, and it is one that I am sure you will not be disappointed with.

Italian Food in London

In my opinion there are two main things that go into making a excellent Italian restaurant - food and atmosphere. I go to Italy quite a lot and Italians believe in La Dolce Vita, the good life. This means good food, good wine and good people. Italian restaurants reflect a way of life and are not afraid of celebrating this way of life and having eaten in few I find they show a great respect for their traditional style of cooking. The perfect Italian restaurant usually buzzes with life, stepping into one should be like stepping into another country where you leave your cares at the door and sit down to a good meal with the people you love
A large part of the atmosphere is down to the staff. Controversial as this may be, I believe that a really good Italian restaurant is staffed with Italians and that is a compliment because they probably get at least one meal whilst on duty. It should feel like you have visited a good friend's house and they are taking pleasure in feeding you the best food you have ever tasted. Italians are so enthusiastic about food that they feel genuine joy in others sharing in the food they have prepared and share a love for. The staff should show an enthusiasm for the food that they are offering and be able to recommend dishes with genuine knowledge arising from having eaten there.
The food of course plays a huge part in making an Italian restaurant great. Fresh produce should be used as far as possible with specialist ingredients imported or genuine Italian products sourced from domestic suppliers. No compromise can be made here, it really is that important.

A proper Italian restaurant pays attention to detail, they handmake their pasta rather than buying it. They buy liquers that are traditional to the area of Italy whose style they cook in because if they use alternatives or substitutes it may radically alter the taste of the dish. The vegetables provided with meat dishes are cooked the Italian way with flavoursome seasoning rather than simply boiled. These may seem like small things but they make the world of difference and set a restaurant apart from the competition because the simple touches will turn a boring vegetable into a divine dish.
Anyone who has been to Italy and experienced real Italian cuisine will understand the difference between an average Italian restaurant and an authentic one and an excellent one. These elements that I have mentioned are just examples of a package that makes a restaurant a supreme one.

Early Morning London

I've always loved Portobello Market where the movie Notting Hill is based. There's an unusual honesty in the smiles of the vendors and I found a pair of Prada heels for 40 that I would have bought if I had the money. It's an antiques market, mainly, full of knick-knacks, pottery and vintage prints, second-hand boots and books with yellowed pages. There are Beatles records and pearly hair clips, stuffed moose heads all over the place.
Down the road, I decided to pop into a toy shop. It was a small shop with tiny old collectibles, all safe behind display cases. There was a sign behind the desk that said, "No shoplifting. Persecutors will be prosecuted. (Stomped on!)." Tiny Smurf figures stood beside Tom and Jerry glasses and old Pez dispensers. I even found some circular Simpson's playing cards.
After two hours of walking, it was after noon and my stomach was growling at me. I turned back through the market and walked past Sushi restaurants and pubs, past a small shop fun by a group of Afghan men where colorful throws were hung along the back walls and sparkly sandals were piled high in baskets in one corner. Finally I came to the pub, Paradise by Way of Kensal Green where I was meeting a friend for lunch. It's a Gothic sort of building I walked through the doors and into a large dining area decorated with vintage cracked mirrors next to big red leather arm chairs and sofas. We sat in a little side room on a red leather sofa, next to a fire place and a wall that had bookshelves full of fake old dictionaries that looked real.
Over food and wine, my friend told me how the pub got its name. That is, by this poem by G.K. Chesterton who died in 1936?
"My friends, we will not go again or ape an ancient rage,
Or stretch the folly of our youth to be the shame of age,
But walk with clearer eyes and ears this path that wandereth,
And see undrugged in evening light the decent inn of death;
For there is good news yet to hear and fine things to be seen,
Before we go to Paradise by way of Kensal Green."
After lunch, we stepped back outside and continued our walk along Portobello Rd towards Westbourne Grove and gravitated towards Paddington..